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Freaking Hermes! How Your Unconscious Tortures You into Action


“Freaking Hermes!”


This is how one of my clients started a recent session. I laughed and told him this was a very good thing.


He didn’t like that answer, but by the end of the session he was ready to have a difficult and honest conversation with his wife.

 

There was more urgency about completing this task since we had explored a dream during our last session. The dream:


 

My father collapsed onto the floor.

 "Go get the defibrillator and call 911!" I screamed.

I was able to revive my father.

Then, he collapsed.

I revived him again with the machine.

Then, he collapsed again.

How long could I keep doing this?

 

“Your inner father needs to be tended to,” I warned. Coincidentally, my client had recently stopped taking his cholesterol medication. Decades of over-adapting to his situation to meet conventional standards of what it means to be a successful man, husband, and father, had taken its toll. This was no longer sustainable.

 

He got it, the connection between his inner battle and his physical health. We shall see what happens next, but no matter what, telling his truth will eventually set him free.

 

So, who is this Hermes Character?

 

The Greek god Hermes, known as a guide of souls, shows up when he’s had enough denial of the truth of your situation. He gets tired of your refusal to take actions to allow your true self to exist in the world. Hermes works in sneaky and infuriating ways. He pisses you off, but eventually he gets what he wants: To prompt consciousness raising about how important you are to the world.


Hermes wants more out of you than simply “putting up” with your life.


By the time I got to the reconstruction phase of my midlife drama, recognizing the presence of Hermes became a game for me. Ironies, obsessions, synchronicities, misplaced objects, slips of the tongue, these all became clues to a mystery that needed to be solved. Sometimes I would laugh out loud when I thought I had learned the lesson quickly.


Other days I cried or exploded with anger at my inability to find the meaning in an event. Like the time I fell down the steps in my house in the middle of the night—two weeks in a row–and within another week I hurt my shoulder and slammed my knee into the car door.

“Fuck!” I yelled at no one after that last one.

 

Hermes is a disrupter, and he is always present during times of transition, says Jungian analyst Murray Stein, one of my favorite writers on individuation. This little devil orchestrates events that feel like practical jokes to trick your ego into loosening its grip. Hermes fools you into accepting the invitation to a transformative experience that requires intense vulnerability. Why? Because you won't go willingly. He pushes you off the cliff into uncertainty about your future.

 

Your guide isn’t doing this to fulfill some sadistic need to be entertained at your expense. It’s more like the tough love we show our children when we sense they need a little push to gain the confidence they need to try something new.

 

Has Hermes Shown Up in Your Life Recently?

 

He might start out with gentle nudges that feel like someone’s playing a trick on you. It could be something as benign as searching for your sunglasses only to find them on your head, or driving around in circles because your GPS isn’t working and you forgot how to trust your inner sense of direction.

 

If you’ve been ignoring the gentle nudges, he might have to take more drastic action, like getting you fired from your job after listening to you complain about it for six months. He might try something even more devious, such as orchestrating an unexpected intense attraction that drives you crazy. You want to act on it but you can’t because you’re married. Or maybe you did act on it and now you’re tortured with guilt about what you’ve done.

 

Consider these as inciting incidents to the real story that’s just beginning. “No way!” you’re going to say because you don’t want to deal with what you’ve been holding down. I guarantee it’s going to get worse.

 

You can feel comforted by the fact that Hermes is also a messenger and protector. Pay attention to your technology, devices and all the different ways Hermes might be trying to give you helpful clues. Maybe you’ve noticed birds showing up this week; they’re symbols of messengers from the gods. You might start seeing white cars everywhere or a strange billboard grabs your attention. You’re listening when you realize some magical force just saved you from going through that red light or how missing a flight ended up being a good thing.

 

Try This

 

Hindsight is a great way to practice being attuned to the presence of Hermes during times in your life when something is trying to break into conscious awareness that you haven’t wanted to deal with. That saying about God not giving you more than you can handle can be comforting at this point. Journaling your analysis of past experiences can strengthen your capacity to find meaning in your present situation.


Being alert to the presence of Soul lessens your resistance to what it wants from you. Next time you lose your keys, you can laugh and wonder what you’re supposed to be doing instead of stressing out.


Also, if you’re having issues with your health, there is always a psycho-spiritual aspect, another way your unconscious is trying to communicate with you.


Sometimes, your dreams will warn you about the consequences of procrastinating taking action that feels too much for you to bear.

 

I can help!


If you’re feeling overwhelmed and tortured by Hermes right now, schedule some time with me to learn a framework for finding the deeper meaning in negative events that seem random. I will see what you cannot see right now; just knowing that will bring immediate relief.



Click here to purchase my book, Your Soul is Talking. Are You Listening? where I introduce you to all the ways your unconscious is communicating with you every day.


The sooner you embrace Hermes as your guide, the sooner you’ll find the humor in his approach. He really is rooting for you!  


Thanks for Self-Reflecting !


Dr. Deborah

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